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Friday, July 06, 2007

Death and Funerals in Qatar

Yesterday I went with some friends to pay respects to the family of an acquaintance who died this week.

In Qatar and other Gulf countries it is very important to pay a visit to the family of deceased people you know. Whereas in the West a person may be given space and privacy, grief in Qatar is a more communal affair.

When we arrived, my acquaintance had already been buried. Muslims should be buried as soon as possible, and this is normally means on the same day. Before being buried, their bodies are washed. Prayer (D’ah) takes place, but this is not the sholat, where people bow and prostrate themselves. Prayer instead takes the form of chanting verses from the Qu’ran.

After a person dies, their eyes will be closed and their body covered with a shroud. Before being taken to the burial ground, their body will be washed. Only men may accompany the body to the burial ground.

When we arrived at my acquaintance’s house, we greeted his relatives. An introduction was muttered before we shook hands with people: this is his brother, this is his father, this is his grandfather. Other people arriving kissed, or touched noses.

An appropriate way to express your sympathy at these times is to say Athamah All’ah Ajakum. Essentially, this is an equivalent to the English “my deepest condolences”.

Only men were present at the house, although we were told there was a separate room for women. In addition to the usual segregation that exists in Qatar, women are not allowed to attend the burial.

After arriving we entered the majelis: a communal meeting room. Chairs lined the walls of this majelis, although sometimes there will be cushions. A majelis also often takes the form of a tent.

We were given a small cup and coffee was poured into the cup from a traditional Arabic teapot. The coffee we were served was qahwa sa’da – coffee without sugar. Dates are not normally served at the time of a funeral. As soon as we had drunk our coffee, the cups were taken and we were given tea.

Interestingly, the drinks were not served by a servant but by a member of the family. This is not always the case, but some families feel that they should serve guest themselves.

The atmosphere in the majelis was very serious. No-one talked. After a death, people should be solemn – this is not considered a time for chatting. Sometimes, to avoid frivolous speaking, parts of a Qu’ran are allocated to different people. The reading will continue until the entire Qu-ran has been read.

At other times a Muki’q – a person who recites the Qu’ran – will be brought along. When he is not available, a tape of the Qu’ran may be played.

It is important to read the Qu’ran and perform d’ah in support of the deceaseed at this time, as Muslims believe the deceased is now being questioned by the Angels.

After finishing the tea, we stood up. Once more we passed our sympathy on to the family, and shook hands. The whole process of paying our respects took about ten minutes.


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